Saturday, June 29, 2013

Confession #1


I never loved her. Never. It was just a liking. A liking for her. But, I also like so many others and it never feels like that. So, was it Infatuation? Maybe. Or was it love? No, I guess. But, who cares? Sometimes, I care, don't I? Yes, I think, would be the honest answer.

There was a yearning for her, an urge to meet her no sooner did I leave her. Wanted to look at her always, glancing at first and then gaping at her beauty till the bell rang announcing the end of the class. Was she really that beautiful? My friends never agreed on that. And, of course, we had more beautiful girls in the class than her. Then why did I gape at her? What charm did she put on me?

Some say its love. But, doesn't violins play in the background when you are with your love and the wind seems to come out of nowhere blowing the dry leaves against you and you keep on looking at her with your mouth wide open as she tries to manage her dress blowing in the wind? Such things never happened with me. Then, how can it be love? It must have been infatuation. But again, doesn't people in infatuation forget the other person in no time and stop caring about her as soon as they are out of their sight for a long time? This also didn't happen with me. I seem to care for her still now when I haven't met her for more than thirty days by now.  So was it love or infatuation? Simply, I don't know. Confused, totally confused I am.

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